It's not going well...

I can't seem to stick to any diet or fasting ritual I've ever done before. Fuck my life.
I remembered a teacher at my Diploma (Who, admittably, I didn't like) telling us about 'Breatharianism', as her mother-in-law was a Breatharian. Well I did some research (And printed well over 13 pages worth of stuff) and Have decided to give this a try.

I am a Breatharian!
But I'm keeping it quiet. People thought I was weird enough for being Vegan (which did not go at all to plan) imagine what people would say when I say 'I live off Air, Light and the Universe'...
They'd send be straight back into CAMHS.

I'm also going to try and get on the tread mill more often. I'm bordering on 160lbs again (and that was a few days ago at the beginning of my binge.) and I don't like seeing it. I don't like feeling my tighs and belly jiggle when I walk. Seeing as I don't go to school at the moment except for exams I should find exercise easy to fit into my life now. Wrong. But I have been going out a lot and walking basically everywhere, which (If I can stop fucking eating) will make me skinny.

Prom is about a month away.
ONE MONTH to at least begin to fix this mess I've made of myself. Then another month to make me skinny for my Drama course. Sharing a mini-apartment with 4 other girls, I may kill myself if I'm not skinny.

My mum's having a BBQ at the moment. I'm being anti-social as I don't know or want to know anyone outside. And I'm tired. And the weather is shit. Quelle Suprise.

I'm also looking into Gym classes at the local Health Centre. For the days I don't leave the house, this would be good. I find classes more motivating anyway... I can't exercise on my own anymore unless I'm in a blazing mood.

This was my fitness and diet update really... No social life crept in this post! XD
If a certain someone doesn't see me tomorrow then I'll post (maybe), if he does... I'll post later (maybe).
I'm unreliable.
I hope you're all doing well. I still haven't caught up :/ I will get round to it sometime!!

Stay strong everyone!
Sending out virtual luuuurve <3
Kodii
x

It's Not My Fault, Honest!

Thinking about watching '90210' seeing as they're all skinny fuckers on that show.

Okay first off, sorry for the delay. I was going to post about a week or so ago but my computer had a spazz. Then I had 4 exams last week, a leavers day party to go to, a guy to meet and an exam yesterday.
The 4 exams last week, eh okay I suppose.
Leavers Day. Skei KISSED ME and admitted he's still in love with me, just fucking up my mind EVEN MORE.
The leavers Day party... got a new smoking buddy, drank a lot, puked. Managed to sleep 12 straight hours after crying my still partially drunken self to sleep.
The guy. Stood me up. He has no chance now. Fuck him I don't deserve to be stood up with out even a text.
My exam yesterday was... okay. Had the last of my bacci yesterday (note to self: GET MOREEE) and shared around a straight fag with Manny, Tedd and Taffy.
.
I feel fat and have binged like a mother bitch today. I had a whole fucking tart. 3 bowels of rice and curry sauce. A bowel of bran flakes. And this is one of the times I wished I could purge.

I'm fasting from tomorrow onwards. I did fast walk/jog for about 20-30 minutes yesterday. Tomorrow I'm ceremonially burning my old school stuff (I AM PFFICIALLY ON STUDY LEAVE!!!!!!! YESSSS!!) With Tedd, Manny and Taffy so I'm unlikely to eat and hopefully I can pinch a few fags from them.

I don't know what I'm doing anymore... I'm shattered. I dont know why. And bollocks, I was going to have a shower an hour ago but lost track of time. Shit.
This is a crappy post.
Apologies.
But I NEEEEEEEED to shower. I might post tomorrow if I get a spare moment, if not then Friday after my Science exam.

Tarrahh!!

much love from the FATTY MCFAT KODIIIIII
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Let Me Dissapear In A Puff Of Smoke, Let Me Die Of Fattness

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH MY BODY!
.
I lost weight after Christmas.
Then I gain 2lbs OVER NIGHT!
Thats it. I'm fasting and exercising to within an inch of my life!!
.
Weight: 146.8 (when I first weighed myself it said '146.6' so I got fatter in about 5 minutes.)
Waist(at belly button): 35
Waist(smallest part): 31
HipBones: 37
Hips/Arse: 37.75
ForeArm: 8
UpperArm: 10.5
Elbow: 9.5
Wrist: 6
Thigh: 19 (MY LEGS GOT FATTER!!)
Knee: 13.5
Calf: 13.5
Ankle: 9
.
FML.
I'm off to exercise.
And not eat.
I'm never eating again.

If I Curl Up Small Enough, They'll Never Remember I'm Here..

What a drastic change from nearly loving Christmas.
.
I hate Christmas with a passion. I am so glad this is my last Christmas with my family. I hate it.
.
Christmas is a pointless holiday. Its where you open shitty presents from people you barley know, eat until you cant move, gain like a bitch and get drunk enough to fall off the sofa.
.
This year, I've ended up sitting by my bed, posting angrily, with some form of Dance music blaring from my new Ipod doc. So many things haven't gone right today. And before you ask. Yes. I am going to tell you.
.
Shit #1. My mum bought the wrong £50 high tops. I mean that doesn't annoy me, if anything I feel sorry because my mum spent loads on shoes I dont even want.
Shit #2. On MY home made place mat, someone had spilt curry on it. For fucks sake! It was only mine! No one gives a shit, obviously!
Shit #3. I scoffed so many waffle-ish biscuits and Belgian chocolates that I'm seriously considering taking MORE laxatives.
Shit #4. I've been to the bath room about 20 times today thanks to my laxative abuse last night.
Shit #5. My Grandfather is an arse hole. All he does is moan, hold everything up and then tell everyone how to play Poker WRONG!
Shit #6. I've had more alcohol than I originally had planned. Only a glass or two more, but I am SO gonna work hard to get this FAT OFF ME!
Shit #7. I'm fat.
Shit #8. I punched a wall. Twice.
Shit #9. I want to die. Just because Christmas is so utterly pointless and supposed to be full of jolly people, but mine always contains my utterly cunt-ish family.
Shit #10. I havent heard from Skei in about 3 days. To be fair, it is Christmas and he is at his Mum's house. But Still, its Skei. He always finds a reason to talk to me.
.
Now. I'm going to get changed into my PJs again.
Find some water.
And take about 4 laxatives.
And Dance. Until I cant feel my legs.
.
'ice cream ice cream we all want ice cream!!' - Pink - Cuz I Can

Bring Me Down, Throw Me Out. I Deserve To Burn...

I'm not even going to tell you what I did.
All you need to know is.
I'm 149.4 again.
.
I wish I could die right now. Or swallow a load of diet pills. I asked Skei to get me some but the Boots we were in was so feckin' small that they didnt have any. FML.
.
For the next however long until New Year I will not eat anything. At all. Only water, flavoured water and green tea. And an exercise regemine I MUST do everyday. I will only allow myself soup on Christmas and Boxing Day because I am with the family and they would be suspicious if I refused to eat anything. Hopefully with this extreame diet, I will lose weight even more quickly then I did last week. I so hate myself for giving in. Fuck me.
.
(If you want to know my exercise (minimum) for each day here it is..)
10 crunches
10 push ups
30 star jumps
20-40 knee lifts
20 toe touches
Plus the exercise program I've got recorded on my Sky+ downstairs, and any other little exercises I feel like I need to do. Probably more cardio will be put in there but this is only a minimum to help shift this God Damned FAT!!
.
I hate Christmas.
I hate Winter.
I hate me.
.
'Why'd you have to go and turn to ice' - LIGHTS - Ice

I Feel My Grip On Sanity Loosening... Depression Ready To Suck Out My Soal...

I had a thought.
I may be 2 lbs lighter than 150 because its period timeee... I'll have to see.
.
I'm not looking forward to this week ending. I still havent even made an attempt at my work, and its pretty crucial to have done. I'm also just scared that I'm not going to even be 145lbs by New Year.
.
I want to loose 10lbs. I have decided I'm not going to eat until then. Determined.
Today I hade 2 egg sandwiches and two small chocolates. Tomorrow. Nothing. It's easy to avoid food with the huge ammount of rehursals I'm doing at the moment. It helps that it envolves alot of standing and moving, and use of my diaphram because of singing. I dance alot back stage out of boredom. Hopefully I'll be burning plenty of calories if I eat NOTHING.
.
I've decided, if I'm not at 10 and a half stone before Christmas, I'm going to get Skei to buy me diet pills because I get so ancy when I even think about buying them. I may feel like a bit of a failure useing them but I'd feel worse if I was 11 stone again. I cant be that. 150lbs is bad enough. I need to get more sleep as well, but I'm just not programmed that way.
.
I want to look amazing at new year in my slightly sailor-ish navy blur satin dress that DOESN'T streach. High heels, skin colour tights, dress hem at just below mid-thigh. I want to be gorgeous, and start my new year on an UP rather than a DOWN.
I want every boy I pass to turn and think, 'wow, she's gorgeous' or 'hey, that guys lucky'... I want to feel wanted. I want guys to want me. I want to be the thinnest girl at that New Years Party. I want to be the hottest. I want to be Beautiful.
I want my ribs and hip bones slightly on display, I want my arms to be beautifully thin for my short sleeved dress, I want my bum to be tiny, my waist to be slim. I want to be able to sit on Skei with out breaking him. I want to show everyone in Pikey Hill (my school) that I've changed more than they would be able to believe. That they now see me as gorgeous, sexy, tiny.
.
I want to hear compliments.
You're so thin.
You look beautiful in that dress.
You've lost weight.
I want to over hear people's conversations about me.
She's hot. I hate her, she's so thin. How'd she get so thin? She looks so pretty. Her smile is so bright. She has a beautiful face, and gorgeous figure.
.
I want to be able to wear anything! Everything will make me look thin, hang off me. I want my size 10's to be falling off of me, my size 8's loose, my currently non-existant size 6's have a little extra space. I. Want. To. Be. Size. 6. Or. Less. I wont stop until I'm at least a six. I know I cant be happy any other way. Even counsilling cant help me. Only with my parental issues. Not ever with my body. It will never work. Even though I said I wanted to start working on it. Feh. I'll change my mind. I'll work on bottled up emotions some more, fuck knows I have plenty of them.
.
I need to stock up on things again...
-Gum
-Nuts/seeds
-Energy drinks (diet of course)
-mixed fruit juices
-Diet pills
-Fags.
.
I'm going to have to find soem time for having a few fags in the next few weeks. I've been tempted. But I find it pathetic to smoke at school. And I'm not addicted, so it's fine.
.
Sudden apiphany. Christmas is a great time to fatten people up. I need to hand out more chocolate to the skinny bitches I know. (Lyd - the main part in the show - being one of them) I'm such a cow. Most people who're on 'diets' give in easily if they're in Secondary/High school, and she's a frequent dieter. >:] In coming chocolate!!! XD HAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAA!!!
.
I'm an utter Evil Bitch. :)
.
'I just wanna fall and loose myself.' - Avril Lavigne - Runaway
x

Wrap Up Warm, It's Getting Cold, Don't Let Me Go, Don't Let Me Fall...

Evening One and All.
.
I have exams for the next few days, it's fucking freezing, I had a bad day over all, and I have alot of Diploma work to do.
.
I have today found out the extremely of my bad circulation. Waiting outside the sports hall for my Maths exam this afternoon, I was so effing cold. I had my hands up my sleeves shivering my arse off when Lii pointed out my lips were purple.
My. Lips. Were. PURPLE!
I may talk to my mother about going to the doctor about this circulation issue I have... What do you think? Wouldn't give anything away would it?
.
I also woke up 5 minutes before I had to leave the house this morning. I managed to get half dressed (well, dressed but with out the extra layers I desire..), half-do make up (green eye liner. That was all) and shove my anthology (a book of poems for my English exam) and phone in my bag. I didn't even brush my hair. I did manage to brush my teeth, even if I didn't have time I would have MADE time.
.
I've started my fasting again. Yeah I died after last Wednesday. Back at 150 odd lbs. Fuck me, yeah? But I'm determined this time because the snow is completely gone (thanks to cunt-ish rain) and I'm at school all week. I'm also going to Germany on Friday! :o I need to get my clothes and etc ready for then. I WILL NOT EAT.
.
Now Kodii, repeat after me. I will not eat.
IWILLNOTEATIWILLNOTEATIWILLNOTEAT.
.
I'll tell you what made my day though.
Lii's mum walks about in exams making sure no one cheats etc. and in the middle of my citizenship exam her phone went off! I was at the back of the hall so I could see her really well, she pulled a face and whispered 'Sorry It's Me!' and me and King just looked at each other and tried not to burst out laughing. All the other invidulators got up thinking it was a student (we're not that stupid, give up some credit!) HA MADE MY DAY.
.
Um. Yes.
I think that's it again.
.
I think i might start ending my posts with thinsperational lyrics...
If I can be bothered I will try it!
.
'She Could Be The Model Type, Skinny With No Appetite'
x

4 Days To Go.

Okay, I'm going to say something thats really fucking confusing me.
(also, why have I lost 2 followers? :[ )
.
But before that, the situation with B? Yeah well I pulled him. Thats what happened, I know, dull but I didn't want Skei to find out. I doubt he'll find out soon seeing as he never comes on Blogger.
.
Right, remember Skei's cousin was texting me (I re-named him Chavvy-Mc-C in my head for a while..)
He is, well basically, in love with me.
Yeah, Okay, HOW THE FUCKK?? Why do I make people love me? He called me the other day because I was trying to convince him that I would eventually fuck him up, he thought I didnt like him at all. I do, really I do, which I hate so much. And we had a really nice conversation. My mum was out so I didn't have to worry about being loud, and we made each other laugh, and the weirdest thing is...
He's just like Skei.
He's tried to kill himself, Cut himself in the past, Blonde hair (Skei is more mousy brown now), blue eyes (Skei's are blue, brown and green), 6'1(Skei's 6'), muscly (Skei has a faint 8 pack), and finally the weirdest of them all...
They sound insanely similar.
I nearly told C when we were on the phone together that he sounded like Skei, decided against it. I'm seeing him next weekend coz he's getting paid then, and I'm busy this weekend anyway.
But Shit.
Now I'm probably gonna have to choose between them. (fuckshitarsemonkeymerdeficktwatt) I've never felt so loved, in a bad fucking way.
.
Skei will be telling me sometime today if he's allowed over on Sunday, I'll probably jump on him... Speaking of... I impulsively kissed him the other day. Oh my days, the way he just sorta stared into space for about 5 minutes after was like, 'dude? wtf?' but when he snapped out of it he gave me that smile that melts my face every time! Damn him!
Later he said, 'no more surprise kisses!'
'Why?'
'Because'
'Because Why!?'
Took a while to get it out of him but he said,
'It's distracting!'
I'm distracting? Wow! I'm distracting, Huh.
(Ohhhh Shiiiit I've just been given a HUGE amount of chocolate, and I'm afraid I'm going to have to EAT THEM ALL FUCKFUCKFUCK!)
But I have issues XD I have to choose between someone who I (at the moment) keep falling in love with again and again (Skei) or fresh meat who's seemingly hot and incredibly nice (C)...
Shit.
I love you.
x

Currently In A Good Mood (I Know SHOCKING!)

Ah, I've decided for the next 4 months and 3 days I'm going to try and get a calorie deficite of minimum 500 calories. Because if I can maintain that minimum for the 4 months and 3 days I will apparently loose EIGHT-TEEN POUNDS!!! And instead of being horrible 150lbs I'd be 132lbs!!
.
So right now I'm going to try the negative-calorie diet until I start school, then I'll go on either MY SGD or the oridginal one! Apparently I burn over 1500 calories just LIVING, so the negative calorie diet for 8 days should be of good use, and when I go on the SGD (which lasts around 20 days) I'll eat lots of fruit and veg especially the negative value ones XD
.
WOOHOO!
I'LL BE SKINNY FOR NEW YEAR!!
.
Oh yes and I told myself to be truthfully honest with you guys about my new (real) measurements. So here we go...
Neck - 13
UpperArm - 11
Elbow - 9.25
ForeArm - 8
Wrist - 6
Bust - 37
Underbust - 34
Waist - 31
Hipbones - 36.5
Hips(ArseArea) - 37.5
Thigh - 18.5
Knee - 13
Calf - 13
Ankle - 8.75
Weight - 150 lbs
.
Is it weird that my neck is the same as my Knee and Calf?? But Woot! I'm loosing inches from my rib area (underbust) before it was probs 38?
But My inches goals to obtain by New Years are only a couple of inches different, and kind of realistic to the goal weight loss and the shape of my body. I think the biggest inch difference in my goals is for my waist at only 3 inches. And my arse area takign away about 2.5 inches so hopefully it'll be do able XD
Does it sound realistic?
.
Meh anyway I'll just leave now :)
Shit... List... x.x
Uhm..
3 current goals you have, doesn't have to be related to weight loss XD
1 lose minimum 15lbs by new years
2 get high grades in my GCSE's
3Get into a good college
.
FIN!
X

Little Rant From G

Hello, this is G.
Kodii's other personality.
Yes I am a guy.
.
I have to rant right now before I attempt to kill Skei or hurt this body.
Right, I'm seriously gonna start head butting things if Skei doesn't listen to me and keeps going on and on about being a fuck up. Yes, fucking well done you're a fuck up. DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!
He fucking says he's had the money and ideas to make things up to Kodii but he goes and spends it on drugs coz he's scared she wont like it. Aren't relationships all about taking chances and trying your hardest to show how you feel? He just hurts Kodii more by taking all these fucking drugs, trying to hide it, then Kodi either finds out or he accidently tells her.
Heres a few promises he's made to her.
-Stop smoking
-stop drugs
-stop cutting
.
And guess what, he still does them all but has cut back on cutting. then he threatens me that if I touch him again he's going to break my neck. Haha, brilliant, trying to get back at me when I'm defending his girlfriend and I'm actually in her fucking body. Brilliant, brilliant threat right there.
And he decides that we dont love them. Obviously I do since I uh fucking proposed to one of Skei's other personalities! Obviously Kodii does seeing as she uh, gave him her virginity, draw things for him every few weeks, tries to celebrate every month anaversary... you get the idea.
And now with him saying shit like this, Kodii wants to kill herself. Again. You know, three times she's been talking to him in the process of killing herself. Every time she;s stopped short of it just to apologise to him for everything she's done.
My God.
She's managed to stop cutting herself for a few months now and is screaming at me to end it for her (I'm not going to just so you know.) And now I have a feeling Skei is SLEEPING in HER BED.
.
He hasn't spoken for a good hour now so I'm guessing he has.
.
My list of today is
3 things you hate the most.
1 technically not exhisting
2 only exhisting in Kodii's body and mind
3 The way Kodii is treated by, I dunno, fucking everybody?
.
Thank you for letting me rant, hopefully next time Kodii will be back to post.
If not, Either me (G), Syke or Ana will post and tell you how she is and whotnot.
Fucking good bye.
Cross your fingers I dont kill anybody!
x

Errrr?

Okay.
Please. Someone SHOUT AT ME I'M A BAD BAD GIRL!!
.
I suck at fasting -.- Caved into a cookie (thanks to Skei) and just pigged out on Mac and CHEESE??!!
My God I'm A HUUUUUGE FATTIE!!
.
So.. Shout At me!
.
I WILL FAST FOR 4 DAYS THOUGH!!
=.= (Determined face)
.
Uhm... Right well.
To new followers who haven't bothered to read my character list: I may be getting checked out, but I cant and wont say yes as SKEI is my boyfriend. Just thought I'd clear that up! Incase people didn't know!
Oh and I made a character name mistake last time x.x T and G... No.. Its T and Gaz. Sorry guys XD
.
I did my first yoga class todayy!!
It sucked.
It was full of old people who could do MORE THAN ME!
WTF! I'm supposed to be flexable? Fucking hell do I hurt!
.
*sigh* Well heres my food plan.
I shall fast for 4 days (til monday) And then move onto my version of Skinny Girl Diet! Basically I halfed the calories so I'd eat less shit and be forced to eat fruit!
Thats like... 3 ish weeks long... I keep forgetting where I left my booklet with it in so I'm not sure. But I WILL FAST =.=
FASTFASTFASTFASTFAST...
I just realised if you type fast wrong it could be 'Fats'
Ironic.
.
I've also set up exercises to do each day on my SGD so hopefully I'll loose weight FAST
See what I did there?
No? Okay.. :(
.
.
Oh God, I dont want school to start in about 2 and a half weeks!! I have course work to do and a book to read for English! GAHH!!
.
But I CBAAAA!!!
Coz, as you all know...
I'M A LAZY FATTIEEE!!
WOO
RUN FATTIE RUN!!
GAHHH!!!
.
I have no lists for you... I'll think of one!!!!
*thinks*
Top 3 people you couldn't live with out!!
1Skei.. (feel special BIYATCH)
2Mannyy XD
3All those sexy people out there! My Thinspo's basically XD
.
Spaz list :3
I'll leave before you get TOO scared of me
Again
I'm sorry! I'll stop!
x

I'M BEING CHECKED OUT??????

Ahahahahaa!!

.

My God I never thought I'd say that!

.

Okay it started at the wedding where I got drunk, the two guys around my age who I got friendly with (thanks to Skei) later in the night (After being rather wasted and T puking a rainbow XD) told me they were both proper checking me out when they first saw me and were doing their weird little signal to eachother meaning they thought I was hot.

.

Oh.

My.

GOD!

.

I've never been checked out before! They said they thought I was like 18 (urhh like 2 and a bit years off bbe XD) and the reason they thought I was hot was coz..

-I have nice legs

-I looked cool in my skinnies

-I have a nice bum

-I have a nice face

-I have big boobs

I mean SERIOUSLY?? 2 guys thought(well think..) I'm hot?? And haha... I slept in the same bed as T and Skei... Both in their underwear... teehee ^-^ I feel slightly whore-ish (Yeah Peri You have a point ;]) And T was the Hot one.. G was the short shubby one. Who's room I got changed in before we even spoke XD He was shocked when he found that out. And I was the first girl to stay in his room ;) PAHAHA! I'M SO COOL! XD

.

And today in Iceland (the food shop..) This kinda hot guy was checking me out when I was standing with my Gran (PAHA!) I guessed he was checking me out because he was looking at me until he passed me. And he made full 3 second eye contact with me.

.

Corr... Am I hot now??? Wow. I don't feel it... But I like the attention XD

.

.

Anyway. I was shocked when I saw the increase in Followers. FANKS PrettyWreck<3>(Btw can someone tell me how to link to other bloggers on my blog? I'm sucha retard)

.

And to whoever likes lists... I LIKE THEM TOO!

Todays list!

5 Favourite possesions. Not people... You don't own people. Well... I don't myabe you do?

Anyway..

1Laptop<3

2My only size 8 shorts

3My Huge comfy trainers that are battered

4My phone...

5My little stuffed toy dog Poppy :3

.

WOO!...

?

I dont know.

One final notice... I'm going to attempt to fast. Yeah. Not much hope really, aspecially for 5 days... BUT I WILL TRY HARD

Ah...

Well... Sayonara <3

x

Jesus You CARE?!?!

Wow you guys care?!?!
I'm so happy :3
Oh yeah. I didn't die
*thumbs up*
But I was almost forced to have a blood test *shiver* coz I over dosed and told the stupid lady at therapy. So my mum knows (Fuckbollocksarseshit) aaaaand good thing I only took paracetamol or I'd have had a blood text *shiver number 2*
.
But anyway, I fixed up my life so I'm okay. Again. I'm so fucking indecisive!
.
Moving on. Thanks you guys on commenting about my drawings XD makes me feel like I'm good at something!! Today's picture I drew astonishingly long ago so my style has changed (kinda matured really XD) since then, and all the pictures I've put up are quite old, I just haven't gotten round to sorting my new ones out! So when I can be arsed, I'll do it.
.
And GUYS! SERIOUSLY?
I make you guys smile?! *blushh* Shucks! ^-^
And haha Peri XD made me laugh, but I need someone to shout sense into me so thank you!
And just thanks to everyone who's actually commented my blog, even some who've only commented once, I like reading your comments XD So please CARRY ON! I LIVE FOR THEM!
*sigh*
Okay, I've calmed down a bit now XD
No.
Fuck! Here I go again!
Hyper Arse Monkey!! XD
Okay. I'll go!
x

Warning. Bad Language In Selected Post. [47]

I hate school. Clicheeeeee.
But really. I hate school. It makes me feel like an idiot even though I'm sure I have a reasonably good IQ.
.
Bad day. Very bad day.
God I have such drastic mood swings don't I?
*Sighhh* Well remember I said I have a Science exam today?
Yeah well, I'm supposed to be doing the higher papers.
But once again, they put me in foundation (the 'Not-so-smart' paper).
I had a fit. Again.
I really need to control these frickin' emotions.
I wouldn't mind if I went all out angry and shouted at every fucker who walks past, but I cry. I end up crying. Whats wrong with me?!
I had to walk about in front of basically my whole year coz I had no idea where my paper was. So I marched up to Mr. StupidPeadoFucker and asked if I was put of the fucking foundation again. He said Yes. Twat. So I calmly explained 'But I'm supposed to be doing the higher paper' and he just quoted what he said last time. 'Well lets just see how you do in the foundation.'
Cunt.
Scuse the extreme language. I am uberr PISSED!
Anyway.
I basically bit a hole in my lip, holding in my psycho rage. As soon as I left the exam hall I threw a paddy and tossed my calculator across the playground. I retrieved it later btw.
I spoke to one of my dumb-ass science teachers and he didn't answer my question of 'why did you put me in foundation when all my mock exams have been HIGHER?!' and I started crying.
He tolds me not to worry I could take it again if my marks are high enough.
But. That's not the point.
The point is you and Ms. Fucking Priss cant make your minds up about weather I'm smart or just as stupid as the fucking rest of my class! And tbqh. I DON'T WANT TO TAKE THEM AGAIN.
I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO TAKE THEM AGAIN YOU TWATS!
WHY COULDN'T I TAKE THE HIGHER EXAM??
YOU HAD FUCKING LOADS OF SPARE HIGHER PAPERS!
I WAS HUMILIATED IN FRONT OF MY WHOLE YEAR(including Kitty who was blaitz taking the higher paper. Fuck.Ing.Shoot.Me.)
AND YOU COULDN'T JUST PASS ME ANOTHER PAPER?
WTF
*Mental punch to the faceeee*
*Mental head butt!!*
*and an array of mental physical violence*
.
God I'm so tired now.
My mums pissed.
They've done it to me TWICE now.
Cunts.
*face plants keyboard*
*repeatedly.*
.
And reading your comments brightened my day.
Feel appreciated!
I love you guys too!
*face plants keyboard one more time.*
x

P.S a Pleb is basically an astonishingly dim person.
I'm obviously one of them.